Here's your sign

My girl friend sent me this from college........



Number One Idiot of 2005

I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center. Today, this woman called in very upset because she
caught her little daughter eating ants. I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into
the hospital. She calmed down and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to
kill the ants. I told her that she better bring her daughter into the emergency room right away.

Here's your sign, lady. Wear it with pride.
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Number Two Idiot of 2005

Early this year, some Boeing employees on the airfield decided to steal a life raft from one of the 747s. They were successful in getting it out of
the plane and home. Shortly after they took i t for a float on the river, they noticed a Coast Guard helicopter coming towards them. It turned out
that the chopper was homing in on the emergency locator beacon that activated when the raft was inflated. They are no longer employed at Boeing.

Here's your sign, guys. Don't get it wet; the paint might run.
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Number Three Idiot of 2005

A man, wanting to rob a downtown Bank of America, walked into the Branch and wrote "this iz a stikkup. Put all your muny in this bag." While standing in line, waiting to give his note to the teller, he began to worry
that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police before he reached the teller's window. So he left the Bank of America and crossed the street to the Wells Fargo Bank. After waiting a few minutes in line,he handed his note to the Wells Fargo teller. She
read it and, surmising from his spelling errors that he wasn't the brightest light in the harbor, told him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written on a Bank of America deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a Wells Fargo deposit slip or go back to Bank of America. Looking somewhat defeated,
the man said, "OK" and left. He was arrested a few minutes later, as he was waiting in line back at Bank of America.

Don't bother with this guy's sign. He probably couldn't read it anyway.
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Number Four Idiot of 2005

A motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that measured his speed using radar and photographed his car. He later received in the mail a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car. Instead of payment, he sent the police department a photograph of $40. Several days later, he received a letter from the police that contained another picture, this time of handcuffs. He immediately mailed in his $40.

Smartass... but you still get a sign

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Number Five Idiot of 2005

A guy walked into a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded all of the cash from the cash drawer. After the cashier put the cash in a bag, the robber saw a bottle of Scotch that he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. He told the cashier to put it in the bag as well, but the cashier refused and said, "Because I don't believe you are over 21." The robber said he was, but the clerk still refused to give it to him because she
didn't believe him. At this point, the robber took his driver's license out of his wallet and gave it to the clerk. The clerk looked it over and agreed that the man was in fact over 21 and she put the Scotch in the bag.
The robber then ran from the store with his loot. The cashier promptly called the police and gave the name and address of the robber that he got off the license. They arrested the robber two hours later.

This guy definitely needs a sign.
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Idiot Number Six of 2005

A pair of Michigan robbers entered a record shop nervously wavi

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA NICE!


#4 lmao! thats great

I Like that kind of stuff. reminds me of the Darwin awards.

LMFAO

Thats awesome.

haha. I got that email a few months back.

LOL, I've seen this before, but still funny as the first time I read it!

Where is my sign?

White male has been coerced into drinking all night, against his weak will. Then he was forced to stagger to a local watering hole to recieve free beers. He then is given money to play "silver star bowling" which is a video game. In his enibriated state, he manages a 236 followed up by a 206. He leaves unexpectedly, even after a pity pint to call his love.

Oh wait, that was me tonight.

Bah.

lol. the bank robber was the best.

The scary part is that I bet ALL of those people were "smart" enough to pass the driver's license test in their state....Imagine them behind the wheel.....