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EuroGoldLS -> RE: got a good joke to share---post it here! (2/28/2008 9:12:54 PM)
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Wahhhahahahahahah!!!![sm=funnypostabove.gif]
Got a couple of good camel jokes:
While in Egypt, I came upon the opportunity to go for a week long camel ride. The guy at the "Rent a Camel" place told me not to forget to "Brick" the camel every 3 days.
"What do you mean, "Brick" the camel?", I asked. He says, "when the camel is getting a drink of water, you smash his balls between two bricks, this causes him to inhale the water very deeply and thus fills both humps." "Well, doesn't this hurt?", I replied. He said, "no, not as long as you keep your fingers out from between the bricks."
Three big burly stupid Sudanese guys rode into Cairo one day on a single camel and were giving the people of the city a hard time. As they rode out of town, word spread to the nearest village that the three men were coming. As they rode into the neighboring village, an old guy walked outside and shouted for everyone to hear "Look theres the one camel with three a$$holes!!!". The three guys, not being very bright, jumped off the camel and promptly lifted the camel's tail an looked all over the camel's backside.
"I only see one...."
Heres a couple of jokes concerning monkeys in a bar:
A guy walks into a bar after a hard day at work. He orders a beer and listens to the saloon pianist playing a familiar tune. Suddenly, out of nowhere a monkey jumps off the piano, onto the bar. The patron isn't concerned with the monkey right away. He turns to stare at a pretty woman in the opposite corner. As soon as he turns back, he finds himself face-to-face with the monkey, who is standing over his mug of beer teabaggin it. The patron shoes the monkey away, the monkey returns to his seat upon the piano. The pissed-off patron promptly walks ove to the pianist and says "SIR! DO YOU KNOW YOUR MONKEY JUST DROPPED HIS GENITALS IN MY BEER?!?!?" To which the pianist replied, "No, but if you hum a few bars of it, I may can play it."[:D]
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking, the monkey starts jumping all over the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them, then grabs some sliced limes and eats them,then jumps up on the pool table, grabs the cue ball, sticks it in his mouth and swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?"
The guy says, "No, what?"
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table - whole!" says the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replies the patron. "He eats everything in sight, the little twerp. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff."
He finishes his drink, pays his bill, and leaves. Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and he has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again.
While the man is drinking, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. The bartender is disgusted.
"Did you see what your monkey did now?"
"Now what?" asks the patron.
"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, then pulled it out and ate it!" says the barkeeper.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replies the patron. "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he ate that damn cue ball he measures everything first!"
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